Movie Review- Bachelorette

Logline: Three friends are asked to be bridesmaids at a wedding of a woman they used to ridicule back in high school.

Cast: Kirsten Dunst, Rebel Wilson, Isla Fisher, Lizzy Caplan, James Marsden

Directed by: Leslye Headland

I know, I know. There are way more interesting movies that I could be reviewing right now, but I do have my reasons for choosing this one. 

Each year a popular website called The Black List releases a list of the best unproduced screenplays in Hollywood. This isn't just any random website. Being on this list means that people in the industry generally loved your work. I can't even fathom how successful this list has proven to be, including a few Oscar winning films well before they were released. Point being, Bachelorette made this list in 2008. This was a pretty stacked list. Inglorious Basterds, The Beaver, 50/50 (then titled I'm With Cancer), Hope Springs, The Descendants, and many many more. It finished around the middle of the bunch with 9 mentions, only one slot under Up in the Air which starred George Clooney.

I hope I have convinced you enough to give me a pass on wanting to watch/review this one. Let's see how it did.

Review

Bachelorette had an atrocious first act, followed by a decently constructed second act, and concluded with a sloppy and uninspiring third.

The story begins as we witness Regan (Dunst) and Becky (Wilson) talking in a café of sorts. Becky is clearly the ridiculed one in high school, Regan is clearly the pretty ring leader. Anyways, Becky is getting married and she wants Regan and her friends from high school to be in the wedding party. Hmmm... didn't the logline say these 3 girls ridiculed her in high school? Why would they be in the wedding party? That's never addressed. Regan phones up her friends Gena (Caplan) and Katie (Fisher) and they all agree to go. Gena wakes up beside a random guy to join in on this phone conversation, Katie is trying on clothes like a spoiled woman. We get a sense of these three women right away, and none of them are remotely likeable. Anyways, the first act comes to a close as the three friends give an awkwardly dumb and unbelievable speech at the night before the wedding dinner a la Hangover 2 when Alan gives his. Comedy is subjective, but this was silly.

Act 2 picks up the pace. A story actually begins! Regan and Katie both get in Becky's wedding dress to take a picture because they're bitches and it'd be funny to make fun of their "friend's" oversized dress... Right. The dress rips and they have to get it fixed before the night is over. The pace starts to pick up, our characters all have goals, and MAYBE, just MAYBEEE, during this journey they might change into likeable characters. Well, not really. There are some comedic moments throughout as they mingle with the groomsmen and such. A stripper cleans her ____ on the dress =\ it's not really THAT bad. They all start turning on each other and it gets kind of stressful because Becky is a character we can all sympathize and we don't want her wedding ruined. The stakes are raised when she talks to Regan and says how grateful she is and that she's one of her best friends. Now they have to fix the dress.

Act 3 is really weird. Katie and Gena hook up with groomsmen (Gena with her Ex, Katie with the nerd from high school) and they kind of fix themselves by finding these men... The dress is fixed and dry cleaned because Gena sewed it. The whole night was a mess and the wedding is just short of one, but Becky gets married and the three girls sit on a bench thinking about the night. It looks like all has changed, and then they say "fuck it, let's get a drink." This is also followed by an awkward Adam Scott speech, kind of like the one the girls had earlier. I hate these. They never work. Then the movie ends with some pop music and I guess that's supposed to hide the fact that the movie was a dud.

Topic of the Day

Likeable characters & story tweaking.

Really, did the writer believe that most normal human beings were going to be able to stand watching three girls who've ridiculed their high school "friend" for years? I'm all for anti-heroes, but there has to be some kind of likeability to them. Even if it's just a little something. Walter White cooks meth in Breaking Bad to leave money for his family after he dies from cancer. Dexter Morgan is a serial killer, but he only kills criminals who have gotten away with their crimes. With these three girls, I had nothing. The approach to change these characters from unlikeable to likeable is interesting, but I suffered from an early disconnection to them. Maybe it's because these characters didn't show me ANYTHING to give me hope they'd change. And spoiler alert, none of them actually did change that much.

I also wanted to point out the story's logline. That's not really a story. Three friends unintentionally wreck their friend's wedding dress the night before her wedding and must race to fix it amidst being drunk and irresponsible before she finds out. Better? I didn't even edit that. I'm sure it could be much better. And if the story focused on that, it would have been paced much better.

Conclusion

Bachelorette suffered immensely from its unlikeable characters. It is to my understanding that these characters were intended to make a change for the better by the time the credits started rolling, but what little changes they made had little impact on their likeability. Topped with two of the most awkward, unbelievable, and silly speeches, this film suffered from a slow first and a confused third act. I don't recommend this one, not even on a date night.

Btw, I hadn't checked Rotten Tomatoes or any other website for a review on this until after I wrote mine. It seems that we're on the same page considering my consensus is eerily close to theirs.

4/10